Why I am I Inconsistent?

Identifying the Root of your Inconsistencies

by Mel
2 comments

Are you struggling with being inconsistent? Do you have a habit of starting things that you never finish? Have you ever sat with yourself and asked yourself why consistency is an issue for you? If you did, what did you find out? Leave it in the comment section and let me know. I’ve struggled with inconsistencies in the past and I never looked at it as an issue. I used to start and stop stuff all the time and never had any convictions about or thought there was anything wrong with it.

When I became closer to the Lord, the holy spirit began highlighting this issue to me and it was more serious than I realized. This issue of inconsistency had been a vicious cycle in my life that I repeated often. This cycle of starting and stopping happened so much that I never accomplished anything. I’ve wasted so many years of my life starting over, in fact, that was the only thing I ever accomplished. Although I never knew how to finish things, I definitely knew how to start them. I became frustrated with this cycle and I became frustrated with constant failures. I needed to know why it kept happening and how I could make it stop.

I started praying and doing some soul-searching. I needed the holy spirit to show me the root of this issue and why it’s been so prevalent in my life. There is a root, a beginning, to every problem. In my case, this problem of inconsistency started when I was a little girl and grew with me. The bigger I became, the bigger this issue became in my life. Yet, the reason was still unknown. Don’t we all struggle with being inconsistent? Don’t we all start stuff we don’t finish? Isn’t this typical? This is when the holy spirit revealed to me that the issue of inconsistency is not vague at all. If we dig deep enough, we can identify the problem.

Identifying the Real Problem

There is a reason for your inconsistencies. You can identify that reason by looking at WHY you stopped, but don’t stop there. Keep asking yourself more questions until you get the answer. Why did you stop? Did you get frustrated along the way? Did you encounter problems that were too big for you to solve? Did you lack the support you needed to accomplish the task? Did you find something else you liked more and decided to pursue it? What was the reason? The reason why will explain why you stopped but it will not explain why you keep stopping. The reoccurrence of this issue reveals that it’s a different problem that you’re not able to recognize and I’m going to help you identify what those problems could be.

  1. You don’t really believe the vision – Yep! This is a truth we’re not willing to admit, yet. We know that God has these grand plans for our lives and it sounds good. But, let’s be real, is it really going to happen? One of the reasons we’re inconsistent is that we don’t believe in the vision that God’s given us. It sounds good at the beginning, but when we get in the thick of things, we begin to doubt if we can actually accomplish it.
  2. You’re following a trend, not the will of God – Sometimes, we’re just doing things because everyone else is. We see how successful other people are in their endeavors and although it’s hard to admit, we start to feel a little insecure. So, we follow the trends and footsteps of everyone else instead of following God’s blueprint for our lives. After experiencing failure, we stop.
  3. You’re not really interested – Let’s face it, we don’t really like what we’re doing. Maybe we liked the idea of it, but when we start doing it, we realized we were not interested in it. It’s not a terrible thing, it’s the truth. The problem is we often know we’re not interested in something but we keep going with the hopes of it getting better. When it never gets better we stop.
  4. You don’t have the gift/talent for it – This is a hard truth. We’ll probably never hear this truth but it’s something we have to be truthful about. Oftentimes, we pursue things we’re not gifted to walk in and when we don’t get the support or results we’re looking for, we stop.
  5. You have imposter syndrome – Imposter syndrome is when you have consistent doubts about your abilities and your accomplishments, along with the fear of being exposed as a fraud despite your success. We constantly doubt ourselves, we fear not being good enough, we second-guess ourselves and our work, and we compare ourselves to others. When we struggle with imposter syndrome, we rob ourselves of opportunities, and when the door closes, we stop.
  6. God did not tell you to do it – Sometimes we get frustrated because things are not working like we hoped they would. The question is, did God tell you to do it? Sometimes things are not working because God’s hands are against them. Sometimes we’re trying to open doors that God’s trying to close. When we experience resistance, it’s often God telling us to go another way or to stop. Once we realize this isn’t the way God wants us to go or this isn’t what God wants us to do, we stop.
  7. You’re easily distracted – We can’t stay committed to anything when we’re distracted. If we lack focus, everything will look like a priority. When everything is a priority, we tend to put off what’s most important. We continue putting our tasks on the shelf and we never pick them back up.
  8. Your emotions are driving you– Sometimes our emotions do the decision-making for us. We let our emotions determine what we pursue or why we’re pursuing something. Once the honeymoon stage ends, we fall out of love with the task.

There are many more examples, but I say all of this to say, what if your problem isn’t really inconsistency but the failure of asking yourself why before you start something, or being realistic about your ability to carry out the assignment before you make the commitment to pursue it?  Sometimes we think we’re inconsistent because we don’t have the discipline to finish something but that’s not always the case. If you took the time and asked yourself a series of questions before starting something, perhaps it would prevent you from starting something that you knew you wouldn’t be able to finish.  Sometimes you have to weigh your emotions and ask yourself if you’re pursuing something out of emotion or as an attempt to fill an emotional void. Sometimes we can’t finish what we start because we’re pursuing it for the wrong reasons. The holy spirit revealed that I was starting things with the wrong motives. I just wanted to be rich, so I tried just about everything. However, I realized I didn’t have an interest in everything. I would hit the ground running for a month or two and then eventually get bored and stop. So, my problem wasn’t inconsistency but a lack of interest…and the wrong motives, lol.

You’re not Inconsistent, You’re not Sold!

Sometimes, we’re just not sold. We’re not fully persuaded that we can do it. The problems I identified are not bad, they’re real. The problem is we recognize them when we’re knee-deep into our commitments and we have to stop because we didn’t think things through. We weren’t honest with ourselves and we didn’t ask ourselves the right questions before we started. Doing this causes so much more damage than we realize and it could potentially hurt people in the process, including ourselves. We waste time, money, resources, and damage relationships. These problems could also hurt your reputation and cause people to look at you as unreliable or untrustworthy.

Before you start or say YES, think about it. Be real with yourself. Ask yourself the right questions. Weigh your emotions and pray about your decision. Allow the people you trust to ask you the right questions and give them permission to give you honest feedback. Pray on it. Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal your heart and your motives. Without denying or resisting the answer, don’t pursue it. It’s going to be challenging but once you filter through all the “stuff” you’ll be able to see clearly and feel confident about not making the commitment.

 

 

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2 comments

Shayla Hilton April 17, 2023 - 11:51 am

Excellent article! There have been many times that I have started a task/assignment and given up on it because “it took too long” or didn’t look like what I heard The Lord say. Thanks for the reminder to believe the vision and be consistent!

Reply
Mel April 17, 2023 - 8:06 pm

Thank you, Shayla! I’ve been there before and several times after, lol.

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